Belated National Women's Month Message
Is your 'friend' controlling, moody, and only have her problems on repeat during every conversation? Are you generally irrelevant to her aside from the fact that you seem to be listening? Is she happiest when you're not? Girl, she's not your friend. She's a bully. She must go.
It's been weighing on me since preschool. Girls fiercely and angrily demanding respect, support, and acceptance from others...as they covertly tear each other to shreds. More often than not, what should be a sisterhood feels like a Hunger-Games-style competition.
As the kids might say, I'm not here for it.
Being the product of an all-girls' school, a dancer for over half of my life (with 99% women), and an overly observational human being, I feel qualified to talk about my perspective on ladies. I've been inundated with messages of female empowerment. Good, bad, or otherwise, girls are the topic of conversation. We're 'being heard,' we're 'fabulous,' and we're 'speaking out.' We're demanding respect. But are we demanding it from each other? And, more importantly, from ourselves?
I'm seeing a lot of side-eye, a lot of eye-rolls, and more than a few screenshots sent around. Photos on social media inspire less than friendly competition. Jealousy is becoming the ugly new default.
I'm writing this for the girls and women that are here for each other. For the moms setting a selfless example with their actions, not their words. For the best friends who put their phones down and sit and listen and care. For the executives who take the time to actually mentor. And for the girls I don't even know who hold the door open. Literally (and metaphorically, too!). Thank you. Thank you for not just yelling 'female empowerment,' but for showing me what it truly is. You all make want to give out a million high-fives and I don't even like high-fives. That's how powerful you are.
So, stop one-upping, stop stewing in anger, stop plotting ways to tear someone else down to build yourself up. And don't tolerate that behavior either. It's not a competition, it's your life. Smile, live it, and hold the gosh darn door. Love you, mean it xx